What's In a Word...Or Lack Thereof

Entrance to Mt. Moriah Cemetery, Philadelphia, abt. 1870

Henry John Burdett has been a shadowy, elusive member of my mother's family tree. I first saw Great-great grandfather's name ("Harry") in a family bible record. A date of birth was recorded and that was all. His marriage to Great-great grandmother, Emily Holmes was noted but no date recorded. Neither was his death. The absence of information was glaring when compared with all the information provided about other family members.

Emily married John Spencer in 1868, six years after she emigrated from Nottingham to the United States with Harry's and her daughter (Great-grandmother Eliza Ann) and son. Harry had gone ahead, sometime between 1855 and 1861. Textile workers (Harry a master lacemaker; Emily a cap-maker), the Burdetts went to Philadelphia, where textile manufacturing was an important industry.

For years I assumed Harry died shortly after Emily and the children arrived, even though I had a tiny piece of paper that should have told me otherwise. A mortuary notice from the Philadelphia Inquirer stated "On May 25, 1890, Henry Burdett. Funeral services at his late residence, 1229 Locust St. this (Wednesday) afternoon, at 2 o'clock. Internment private." I studied that tiny piece of paper many times, wondering who this person with my great-great grandfather's name was, and how he fit into Mother's family tree. Some kind of cousin (aren't we all?); some kind of uncle; popular name--"Henry".

Here is a genealogist's cautionary tale: Beware of ignoring the facts because of your theories, especially ones influenced by societal norms and expectations. Henry HAD to have died for Emily to have styled herself "widow" as she did in the Philadelphia City Directory two years before she married John Spencer. Right? People didn't remarry if they weren't freed, either by death or by divorce, to do so. Right?

To use the popular response---Not so much.

Henry John Burdett, it turns out, lived almost 30 years longer than I hypothesized. It took me nearly the same number of years to realize the tiny mortuary notice, probably clipped from the paper by Henry's daughter, was that of my great-great grandfather. I knew from Grandmother's genealogy notes, that Henry Burdett, husband of Emily, was buried in Mt. Moriah Cemetery. A couple of years ago, the Historical Society of Pennsylvania put all 57,000 internments in Mt. Moriah online. There was Henry whose birthyear matched MY Henry's. There also in the same plot were Wardles, and Godbers, people my grandmother spoke of as---what else?---cousins. There was also Catherine Burdett, whom I knew from the U.K census of 1851 was Henry's mother. Proof that Henry lived years beyond my original assumption came when I found "Burdett Godber" in the1880 U.S. census. He was living in the home of his sister, Elizabeth Burdett Godber---at 1229 Locust St.

So here's the new theory. Henry left Emily and the children and went on to America. Did he promise to send for them or did he just leave? I'll never know. There is no divorce on file in the Philadelphia City Archives. I've gone through them. Did Emily come to America in search of Henry and never find him? I have yet to locate him anywhere in the 1860 and 1870 censuses, so kudos to her if she did find him. Or did they meet and agree to go their separate ways? Their marriage had been one of necessity, and might never have afforded either any happiness. As strangers in a strange land, they could easily have agreed to separate, avoiding the expense of a legal divorce, reasonably certain they wouldn't meet up with someone who knew they'd once been man and wife.

Here is an important part of my new theory, and the absence of a single word on Henry's grave marker supports it. My theory is that Henry was "difficult". He had become a "master lacemaker" in Nottingham, meaning he was on top of his trade and occupied an important position in a lace-making factory. (The master lacemakers were in charge of setting the lace patterns on the machines.) In Philadelphia he could have continued a career in the textile industry, but instead, he worked in a "seegar store". His death certificate gives "cirrhosis" as cause of death. He lived in his sister's home. It seems likely Henry suffered from alcoholism, making him unable to ply his trade, unable to afford his own home, and making him probably a thorn in the side of his family.

The gravestone in Mt. Moriah , a four-sided marker commemorating various family members, seems to speak a thousand words in the absence of one. Can you spot it?

"In Affectionate Remembrance
of Elizabeth Godber"

"In affectionate remembrance of
Ada H. Wardle and Sarah Ann Wardle"

"In affectionate remembrance of
William Burdett and his wife Catherine"

"In memory of John H. Burdett"